Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Independent Dependents

We are known as the Dependent.
The ones who stand behind our soldiers.
We are the ones who stand in the Silent Ranks,
Dependents who are independent.

That sounds a bit of a oxymoron, Does is not?
But if you look at how we live our lives,
And all that we do.
You realize, the word Dependent doesn't mean squat.

We are Independent Dependents, in all that we do.
We play the part of two people,
We may be military dependents.
But the question is, who really depends on who?


** Let me know if it's crappy. I have been avoiding writing poetry about the whole dependent issue due to the recent excess in drama on Military S/O's who are not spouses.**

Written by S.Smith on March 15th 2011

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

DRAMA RAGE # 2 Back to Marriage Pt 2

"In all actuality (I hope I don't get banned for this), the marriage certificate does hold a lot more than just a piece of paper. Without that certificate I wouldn't have post housing, or my ID card, my tricare. It is a BIG factor. Bf/gf's a...re expendable. I swore I would never date a soldier growing up cause I watched all my teenage friends see their men off (or girlfriends) and then get that phone call or letter a few months later(or years) that they just didn't feel the love there and since they weren't married all my friends got out of it was...living in a new place with no family or friends to comfort them cause they followed the guy(or girl). As a wife, they can't just leave you like that. It's a little more difficult so it makes them think about it.

On another note, cussing at people and calling them names on a forum cause they have a difference in opinion is wrong. That would be like me telling you that you can't like something cause I don't like it...then enforcing it. It's a debate page, everyone will have a conflict of interest especially when something like "marriage being just a piece of paper" is involved. And defending people you like or talk to online can be done without resorting to cursing about another person or attacking their credibility."


Yet again it has been brought up, that marriage is just a piece of paper. As a wife, my husband has to divorce me to leave me. If you are a girlfriend all that has to be said is "Hey, I met someone new and it's not working out between us. I hope we can still be friends." They can leave you in a letter, an email, a phone call, face to face and then be out of your life forever. As a wife, you have to sit down with a lawyer after the fact and you have his last name "legally". Without going to court and changing it yourself.

As a military wife, I am enrolled in DEERS and I have my ID card and tricare. I recieve benefits. Yes, I applaud girlfriends because they stick by their soldier without these benefits and make it work on their own but that in no way...rivals that of a wife. Most Girlfriends that bash wives intend to marry someday. And they think their views wont change on the subject, that might be true. Until the day a brazen young girlfriend walks up and says that the wife of 8-10 years is no better than her 2 month relationship with her soldier. Then the tune might change.


It all comes down in the end,
that I am a military Spouse,
his 'independent' dependent

and I hope all girlfriends,
are aspiring to one day...
make their soldier happy
as his WIFE.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Married to the Military

I wait here by the phone,
waiting for a call and a sign that your alive and well.
I lay alone in our bed,
Clutching your picture to my heart.

Do you think you can understand the way I feel inside right now,
The pride, the love, the hope that lives within my soul.
Do you think you can imagine, the way my life goes on?
It goes on because he fights for me.
Married to the Military.

I sit here waiting for you letter all week long,
I beat the mailman to the box every day.
I never leave my phone for chance that you might call,
I think its super-glued to my side.

Do you think you can fathom how I feel inside?
The pride, the love, the hope that lives within my soul.
Do you know how proud I am,
because he is out fighting for you and me?
Married to the Military.

-S.S



Monday, December 13, 2010

I will be strong.

I will be strong.
Though each day I am faced with the fact that you will be leaving soon.
I will be steady.
Even though times would call for me to break down and fall apart.
I will be proud.
Because you are doing this for us and our future.

I will guard your back while you are here,
Then when you leave I will hold down the fort till your return.
I will be loyal and loving,
Yet fierce and hard.
I will be the one you need me to be.
Because I love a soldier.

The army may have you now,
But I will always have your heart.




Written by S.N.Smith (12/13/10)

Thursday, December 9, 2010

I am an Army Spouse

I am an Army Spouse. I am proud to be one.
I stand behind my soldier and I do what needs to be done. He needs me to stay home and take care of things while he is gone, so I do it. He needs someone who will keep everything in order for him and play the part of husband and wife. I have to be calm. I have to be steady. I have to be strong...for him. I cannot be weak and childish. I cannot play into others games. I must be mature when no one else around me is. I must be solid.

I take care of him because it is my choice. I stand silently at his side while he is home and guard the home-front while he is gone. I will have moments where I question things when times get rough but I will always know my duty as an army spouse. It is my duty to take care of things at home, it is my duty to keep life going as if he was still here. It is my duty to be stronger than most, because most couldn't do this job. I stand among the women who walk with heroes and I will never falter.

I am strong.

I am an army spouse.

written by S.N.Smith (12/09/10)

Thursday, December 2, 2010

2010 Fashion -Military

In my Opinion...People should really shut up about the ACU purses thing. I have not once seen a purse hurt someone. Nor I have seen people be hurt for looking upon someone who had a specific kind of purse.

So why is it such a big deal about Army Wives(or prior service women)to have one of these ACU purses?

Because people have nothing better to do with their time than to harp on a style. Yes, I know this is what the action is because at one time it was my job to harp on the latest styles and what was not in style. Guess what the sad thing is ladies, Military is in style for the year 2010. So harp on it being unattractive and ugly all you want but for the next month you still have to bear with it being the current fashion.

If you do not like this current trend, I would suggest you bury yourself in a hole for another month or just hold your tongue and ignore it. Cause no matter what you say, people are not going to put their lives on hold and what they like...just to make your day all sunshine and daisies.


~S.S

Friday, November 5, 2010

NEWS UPDATE! THERE IS A SPOUSE HANDBOOK!

Before I hear that there is no military spouse handbook with guidlines for conduct I would like to clarify something...

~drum roll~

THERE IS...

I love having people argue with me even when I link them to two separate versions of it. The one I got from the officers wife on the scribe page for US ARMY conduct and spousal conduct and "The Army Wife Handbook." Yes ladies...there are books that tell you how to behave and how not to behave and how your behavior affects your husbands career. SO while you shouldn't post pictures of you in your bikini on a public page for the world to see while your husband is down range...you shouldn't insult the woman who does it either. I am only posting a blog on this because frankly I spent the morning being told I thought I was god cause I was quoting stuff out of the conduct guidelines (and i might add I was doing so without the use of curse words or malicious behavior). Now if I didn't have the education I have and the will power to prove people wrong all the time, I would have gotten nowhere with these posts of mine. BUT....frankly, I do know what I am talking about on some things...and I was raised to know how to behave around soldiers and NCO's. It's been programmed into my brain how to be the perfect model army wife. DO I ALWAYS FOLLOW THESE GUIDELINES? Of course not, I am human...I do things without thinking them through. But when I am wrong ...I admit it...unlike these ladies here
.


So yes, I did not cuss at anyone I merely stated facts and I got to experience the ignorance first hand. There is a conduct on behavior and it's not just how you should dress though Nicole was being a smart ass she got it right. The way you behave and dress can be reflected on your husband, and if he ever wants to go "Green to Gold" it does matter. They pay more attention to us than you think...why do you think how your house looks means so much? Why do you think they have regulations for what we can and can't do on post? Am I the only one who thinks they have these for a reason and actually try to find out why? Jeez...

-S.S

&& PS...those links are... http://www.scribd.com/doc/1822310/US-Army-SPOUSE-HANDBOOK && http://www.amazon.com/Army-Wife-Handbook-Complete-Social/product-reviews/0962622826